Time flies...

It has been just a day or so short of one year since I asked my husband for a trial separation.

I just want to let that sink in for myself for a moment.

It's been one whole year that I have lived on my own. And guess what? I didn't die. I didn't become homeless. I didn't sink into a bottomless depression. I didn't lose anything I can't go on living without. I have my health and I have so many wonderful friends. I have my family and I have space for myself in my own life. I have a roof over my head, food in my kitchen, and a fluffy companion to warm the foot of my bed. It's hard to imagine now what I was so afraid of when I started.

I have hobbies and interests I had forgotten about and things I've always loved to do and things I never thought I'd like before. I have opened myself to new people and new experiences and new opportunities every step of the way.

And through it all I never imagined that I could love a life so thoroughly, because this life is mine.

I've worked hard to grow and change and become the kind of person I can respect. I've fallen, gotten hurt, and picked myself back up. I've stumbled and been helped back up by some of the most amazing people I've ever met (seriously, feel free to be jealous because my friends are the best.) I'm kidding, of course...but only about the jealousy part.

I've learned to be flexible, and to be disciplined. I've learned to be independent and brave but also to be vulnerable and to ask for help.

Most of all what I have learned in one year is that I am enough for me.

This year has been the hardest and most personally fulfilling chapter of my life. I've met each difficulty and overcome it by being resourceful and learning to rely on myself.

Guys, I'm getting embarrassingly emotional writing this post, but it's because I'm just so damn happy. I feel like I can't even fit all the love I feel for this year, for these people, for myself, for the beauty of every damn thing in the world into one being.

I know that the sociopolitical world is a blazing dumpster fire right now and that this is not how many people feel at this moment in history. Because of that, I'm even more grateful for all that I'm fortunate enough to have in my life. Of course I still care that people are fighting to keep their families together, and women are having to fight all over again for our basic reproductive rights, and men are fighting to define what masculinity really means. I care deeply about all of that and my heart breaks for the people who are being further disenfranchised by a broken system. However, I feel no shame in using mindfulness and gratitude to grow as an individual and to shut out the noise and keep living my best life. The best way I can contribute to fixing the problem is to be the best self I can be.

At this moment I'm just so incredibly grateful for this opportunity to grow and change and live exactly the life I want to live. I'm also grateful to have this outlet; to be able to pour myself into a project and reap the benefits of accomplishment that come from doing something I never thought I'd ever be able to pull off.

So here's to one year solo, and to however many more are yet to come. I'm going to live every minute of this single-ness to the fullest.

What is the biggest, scariest, most exciting thing you've done in the last year? What's the one thing you're doing right now that you once thought was impossible? What's the next awesome thing you're going to tackle?

(I am woman, hear me roar)